Every writer goes through the same feelings of self-doubt at one time or another. Am I good enough to do this professionally? Am I sure this is the best my manuscript can be? Is my query letter an accurate snippet of what my book is about? Is my storyline clear? Is there enough conflict?
We beat ourselves up with a barrage of negativity that serves no purpose. But what about how stressful it is, you ask? Anything that’s worth doing is going to be stressful at some point. That’s unfortunately the way it is. We do have a choice however, on how we handle that stress.
If you want to look at it as insurmountable, that’s your prerogative. In case you’re feeling brave and want to step out of the dark-side for a moment, I’ve compiled a top ten list of things to be proud of. At first glance some may appear to be negative, but trust me anything can be positive if you allow it to be.
10. You received a personalized rejection on your query.
9. You received a partial request.
8. You got a few form rejections
7. You got a full request!
6. You’ve made new friends in the writing community.
5. You wrote a kick-ass query letter.
4. You didn’t drop-dead on the spot from more rejection.
3. You sent out more query letters. (Take that rejection!)
2. You COMPLETED A BOOK!!!! (Then edited it, revised it, & pulled your hair out.)
1. You pick yourself up and do it all again.
You sound pretty darn amazing don’t you? So stop with the self-doubt already. You’re one of the bravest people I know. You put yourself out there every single day. Sometimes you get good news, sometimes you get bad. But you take it all in stride, handle it with grace and that’s something to be proud of.
You see that personalized rejection as a good sign. Heck someone took the time to write it and it’s not a form letter. Go ahead and smile over that. You deserve it. But you’re still saying, ‘I’ve got a bunch of form rejections too.’ If you never feel the sting of a form rejection, how can you taste how sweet a full request is?
I’ll leave you with an amazing quote by Shel Silverstein to fight those doubts away.
“Listen to the mustn’ts, child. Listen to the don’ts. Listen to the shouldn’ts, the impossibles, the won’ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me… Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
What are YOU most proud of? Let me know in the comment section or on Twitter.
Ah yes, I can still remember that fateful day I sent out my very first query. I was a query letter virgin prior to that and I had such expectations for that lil’ bugger. When it was rejected I checked my heart to see if it had fallen out of my chest, but alas, I was still intact. These are ten good points every writer should be proud of. A rejection won’t kill you. It’ll make you stronger.
Hatter I couldn’t agree more. I think back to my first query and I’m so proud of how far I’ve come. And who knew rejection wouldn’t kill you?! 😉 Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
I’ve been following your posts on twitter and here and I think this is my first ever comment. THANK YOU. This is exactly what I needed to hear today.
Aww, thanks so much for commenting! I’m really glad this post resonated with you today. Keep up the amazing work. You’ll get there!
I especially like number 1 and number 2. Great post 🙂
Thanks Melody!
Man this makes me feel like I’m making huge strides! Thanks so much!
You are making huge strides! Plus you wrote a pretty kick-ass Guest Post too, so you can add that to your list as well 😉 Keep up the amazing work Eileen!
I’m still pretty much at the top of the list, but…it kind of gives me hope for the future. It can’t ALL be bad and frustrating, right? You’re right, though. Thanks for a great post.
~Laurie
I would think of it this way, even at the beginning stages you’ve done something most people will never do. You completed a book. You applied the idea to the keyboard, added some sweat and hard work and got the job done. THEN you designed a query letter.
If you get more no’s than yes’ don’t give up. Brush it off and keep going. All the parts that are frustrating fly out the window when those requests roll in, making it all worth it.
Thanks for sharing your comment and good luck on the road to publication!
Kerri